Marketers understand there's a world of a difference between presenting options as 'opting in' vs. 'opting out'.
Although customers always make the choice, the way the default is presented is of paramount importance. If by default someone is in, most will stay in. For this reason, you will find some options on online forms, with the checkbox already checked by default. Had the default been unchecked, few would actually go ahead and choose to check it.
This simple idea guides so many areas of life. Recent studies suggest, that the importance of cultivating healthy eating and exercise habits in children, is more than just ensuring they are healthier during childhood, most importantly it has them 'opted in' for healthy choices during their adult life as well.
Pharaoh, in this week's Torah portion - Bo, failed to realize the importance of this idea. Before the seventh plague, Pharaoh is about to cave to Moses' demand, and let the Jews go worship G-d in the desert as they have been asking for. He had one issue: "Let the adults go and worship your G-d, why take the children?!"
Moses responded that the children's participation was not up for debate: "With our youth and with our elders we will go, with our sons and with our daughters...".
The heart of this debate lingers today as well.
The Pharaohnian approach to spirituality and a relationship with G-d, is that it must be introduced to the sophisticated mind of an adult. When the children grow up, I will sit them down and present the case for religious observance. for now, let them be busy with schoolwork, sports and lighter stuff. They can always opt in later, when they are ready.
The Jewish approach, on the other hand, has always been, that Jewish education starts from day one. We immerse our children in the full Jewish experience. Whether through Shul, Shabbat dinners, bedtime Shema or a Mezuzah on their bedroom door our job as Jewish parents is to cultivate healthy spiritual habits and ensure they know they are 'in'!